Showing posts with label jean-claude van damme. Show all posts
Showing posts with label jean-claude van damme. Show all posts

8.11.2017

Midnight Confessions Ep. 124: "Kick Ass August - Part 1 of 2"


Kick Ass August is now in effect! That’s right, we’re diving into the action movie genre for all of August—but specifically, martial arts driven flicks. We needed a bit of a palate cleanser before we go into full horror mode in September and October. We’re starting of with 2 kick ass classics indeed: KICKBOXER (1989) starring Jean Claude Van Damme and RUMBLE IN THE BRONX (1995) starring the phenomenal Jackie Chan. 

Plus music by: Don Henley, A Tribe Called Quest, KISS and Dean Martin.






 




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1.05.2014

The WTF? Worst Films Extravaganza Presents: Street Fighter (1994)

DIRECTED BY
Steven E. de Souza

STARRING
Jean-Claude Van Damme - Colonel William F. Guile
Raul Julia - General M. Bison
Ming Na Wen - Chun Li Zang
Byron Mann - Ryu Koshi
Damian Chapa - Ken Masters
Wes Studi - Victor Sagat
Kylie Minogue - Lieutenant Cammy
Peter Navy Tuiasosopo - Edmund Honda
Andrew Bryniarski - Zangief
Grand L. Bush - Balrog
Roshan Seth - Dhalsim
Jay Tavare - Vega
Miguel A. Nunez, Jr. - Dee Jay
Robert Mammone - Carlos "Charlie" Blanka


Genre - Action/Science Fiction/Martial Arts/Video Games

Running Time - 101 Minutes


Back when arcade machines were still popular, I don't think I spent more quarters on any game as I did on Street Fighter II. Capcom's premier fighting game was, and still is, an addictive button-mashing fun time. I'm not sure how much money I spent playing Street Fighter II at the arcades. I loved feeling that accomplishment of trying to get to M. Bison, when all of a sudden another player would step in and kick my ass. Bastard. But thankfully, I was able to buy Street Fighter II for the Super Nintendo, as well as Street Fighter II: Championship Edition, as well as Street Fighter II: Turbo. I was kind of obsessed with fighting games in general, but Street Fighter II was my jam. Hell, I still enjoy these games, although I prefer IV over Third Strike and Alpha.

With anything that captures the culture's attention, Hollywood has to stick their unnecessary nose in and try to milk it through some film franchise. We saw it in 1993 with SUPER MARIO BROS. [sigh]. We still see it now with all those RESIDENT EVIL movies [guilty pleasures]. But in the 1990s, the video game film adaptations weren't really known for their quality. To be honest, 1995's MORTAL KOMBAT is probably the only highlight during this era - and sadly, it's still one of the better adaptations out there next to probably 2001's TOMB RAIDER, 2006's SILENT HILL, and maybe a couple of those RESIDENT EVIL films. In 1994, STREET FIGHTER: THE MOVIE was made to capitalize on the fighting game craze by attempting to bring those classic characters to life on the big screen. Unfortunately, the stars were not aligned for this adaptation, probably creating one of the most hated 90s films of all time. And 20 years later, I can honestly say that time has not been kind to this film. But hey, it's better than the game that was created from this, as well as the 2009 reboot STREET FIGHTER: THE LEGEND OF CHUN-LI. So it's got that going for it!

PLOT
It seems world peace is being threatened by an evil dictator named General M. Bison (Raul Julia). However, there is hope - a military task force led by Colonel William Guile (Jean Claude Van Damme) and his lieutenant Cammy (Kylie Minogue) plan to do whatever it takes to overthrow Bison's tyranny. But things get personal when Bison takes Guile's best friend, Charlie (Robert Mammonne), and others hostage - threatening to kill them if the Allied Nations don't pay him a multi-million dollar ransom. The A.N., fearing what Bison will do, relieve Guile of his duties so they can pay the ransom. But Guile wants to finish what he started. Enlisting Ryu Hoshi (Byron Mann) and Ken Masters (Damian Chapa) to infiltrate Bison's organization by gaining Victor Sagat's (Wes Studi) trust, Guile wants to take out Bison from the inside. With the unwanted help of ace reporter Chun-Li Zang (Ming-Na Wen), Guile and Cammy plan on defeating Bison once and for all.

REVIEW

I have three words for STREET FIGHTER: THE MOVIE:

WHAT THE FUCK!?



Seriously, STREET FIGHTER: THE MOVIE is just a bad film on almost every level. While the game itself isn't really deep in terms of story, a decent-to-good movie could have been created out of this successful fighting game franchise. Instead, we get a script that has nothing to do with the game itself besides the character's names. We also get bland direction, strange casting choices, and just an overall feeling of "what in the hell did I just see?" I honestly can't think Capcom had any sort of say in this project. If they did, then I question their sanity. But then again, I'm sure huge sums of money will cure any sort of temporary mental illness.

Out of all the bad things I mentioned, I think it's the story itself that bums me out the most. One of the big reasons for that is that this screenplay was written by the man who directed this film, Steven E. de Souza. While not many may know him for his directing skills, many will know the man for writing some of the best action films out there. This man wrote 1985's COMMANDO, 1987's THE RUNNING MAN, and the first two DIE HARD films (1988 & 1990). He also wrote 1995's JUDGE DREDD, but that's a film I'd like to forget too. Still, how can a man who wrote so many great action flicks write such an insipid piece of crap like STREET FIGHTER: THE MOVIE? Did the studio interfere? Was the budget compromised or something? Or did de Souza only care about a check at this point in his screenwriting career? I honestly can't say, but something just didn't click here.

Now like I said, the Street Fighter games aren't really known for their epic stories. But by playing them, you do know who the characters are, their motivations, and even their backstories when it comes to other characters in the game. MORTAL KOMBAT proved that you could turn a fighting game into a pretty fun film if you research the game enough and manage to at least maintain the essence of the franchise. I'm not expecting the game to exactly play out on film like it would on a console. But when I'm watching a Street Fighter movie, I expect to watch it feeling as if the filmmakers knew exactly what film they were inspired by. Honestly, I think de Souza was given a bad Cliff Note's version of what the game was and decided to write his film based on that.

The fact that the main character here is Guile instead of Ryu is the story's biggest misstep. Guile was most likely picked because he's an American character that represents the military. So obviously, in terms of Hollywood storytelling, he has to be the action hero. And I'm sure many players used Guile since he had the easier move list to use [performing both the Sonic Boom or the Blade Kick didn't hurt on the hands]. But the thing is that Ryu is really the main character of the Street Fighter games. He's been in the franchise since the first Street Fighter and he's probably the most popular of all the characters in the franchise. He's also a more interesting action character than Guile is. Instead of doing the story that de Souza did, why not a BLOODSPORT-type deal where Ryu goes through some sort of tournament where he fights characters in the streets to get to his main adversaries, Sagat and M. Bison? It may not be the most thrilling story, but it would be more faithful to the game than this film turned out to be. Hell, it probably would have been better received as well!


Instead, we have to watch a stereotypical good vs. evil battle where our American hero must defeat a foreign villain who plans on taking over the world. Yawn. But even films of this type can be good and interesting. Instead, de Souza threw a bunch of shit to a wall and decided to connect the stains to write this ridiculous script. I mean, he couldn't even get the backstories right! Chun-Li is a journalist instead of a cop? E. Honda is a TV producer? Balrog is a camera man? Ken and Ryu are ARMS DEALERS??? Who the fuck thought audiences would accept these changes? Don't even get me started on Charlie, or Blanka, or whatever this monstrosity was. Instead of having Blanka be born a monster and create a sympathetic backstory for him, we have Charlie [who is a separate character in the Street Fighter games] be transformed into Blanka through the use of chemicals and a Virtual Boy depicting violent acts to corrupt his brain. Now I know where the inspiration to BATMAN & ROBIN's Bane came from. God, what was de Souza smoking while writing this film? This isn't Street Fighter! Where's the tournament? Where's the fighting? Hell, where are the streets??

It also doesn't help that STREET FIGHTER: THE MOVIE seems to play out like some sort of joke. It's cheesy as hell, with silly one-liners and moments that make you laugh rather than thrill you. It plays out like a cartoon, when it should play out a bit more seriously. Yes, MORTAL KOMBAT had its campy moments as well, but it also had a script that knew when to be serious. This just seems to play out as a spoof to the video game. Sure, the characters are pretty silly if you think about it, but don't insult the fans by making a mockery of their favorite game.

Also, the story is just pretty bland. All the fighting is saved until the last 25 minutes really, and none of it is done in the streets. Hell, we get a GODZILLA moment between E. Honda and Zangief that just made me roll my eyes in embarrassment. But at least that was memorable compared to the dull second act, in which characters just walk around, and blurt out expository dialogue to explain their actions. It's as if this was setting up the film rather than the first act, which at least had some action to kind of keep you somewhat engaged. This whole script was backwards. I don't know what else to really say about it.

Okay, I will say that the dialogue is cheesy enough to make you chuckle. It also helps when you miscast actors for certain characters, making the dialogue stand out more for all the wrong reasons. Jean-Claude Van Damme, in particular, is playing an American character who must recite motivating speeches to his fellow actors. Watching Guile butcher the English language is pure entertainment every time. Seriously, who thought this was a good idea? At least it humored me and made me want more of Guile's hard-to-understand dialogue. And I gotta give credit to de Souza for at least inserting certain dialogue from the video game itself. It's just that the film should have been more of a faithful adaptation of the game - if not in story, at least in essence and feel.

Since the game is known for the characters' special moves, you'd think the $35 million budget would allow for recreations of these moves in live-action form.

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha...


I'm sorry. I shouldn't joke like that. You'll barely see any of those moves recreated. Guile does do his Blade Kick. M. Bison does levitate and cannonball himself into people [although the way he does it is cheap - magnetic boots really?]. And I think I barely saw Ryu perform a Whirlwind Kick. And was that weak uppercut Ken's Dragon Punch?

Where did all that money go? Jean-Claude Van Damme's secret bank account for hookers and coke?

Seriously, the characters barely do anything that resembles a Street Fighter game. With a budget that high, we should have seen more than we actually do. Instead of having shit explode and wasting cash on a Virtual Boy, we should have gotten some special effects bonanza with characters beating the crap out of each other. At least MORTAL KOMBAT made it up for us a year later. But STREET FIGHTER: THE MOVIE should have done it first.

The direction by Mr. de Souza is just as bland as they come. There's no real style at all in this film. It's competent for what it is, but it's not exactly a very exciting or thrilling film to watch. In fact, it drags a bit and probably should have been 15 minutes shorter. And the action is pretty bad, not gonna lie. The choreography just wasn't there for me. For a film about fighting, you'll be severely disappointed. I do appreciate that when we see characters bust out their special moves, he doesn't really cut away from it. The film does look pretty nice as well, with some great sets and exteriors that are eye candy. And I love that last shot where the characters do that pose all at once - poses taken right from the game when a character wins a round. The visuals have their moments every now and then, but the direction is pretty uneventful for the most part.

The acting - man, what can I say about the acting? Jean-Claude Van Damme probably ruined his status in America starring in this movie. Surprisingly, I don't really blame him totally for it. Yes, he was terribly miscast as Guile - an actor with an BELGIUM accent playing an AMERICAN character - really? But I'm sure he got a big check for the role, and who wants to turn down money like that - especially in 1990s dollars? Seriously though, Van Damme seems to be going through the motions here. Van Damme is a charismatic guy, but this role worked against him. The dialogue he recites is not only silly, but makes the fact that he's playing a full-blooded American even more ridiculous. His heart just doesn't seem to be totally into it. Maybe he realized the script sucked and just said "fuck it". I'm not really sure. Still, terrible casting.


Raul Julia, in his last film role before his tragic passing, is probably one of the highlights as M. Bison. He may not look like the character all that much in terms of build, but at least Julia seems to be having a ball acting as over-the-top as possible. It's been said that he knew he was really sick, but took the role anyway because his children were fans of the video games. I can't hate on Julia for that, as he wanted to make his kids smile. While the script worked against him, at least Julia tries to make it work and seems to be having fun. Nothing wrong with that. He entertained me.

The other actors are a mixed bag. Ming-Na Wen is actually very good as Chun-Li, seeming to embrace the silliness of the film and making the character somewhat captivating. I think she had the best material to work with as well, which worked for her. Nice to see her still around, as I think she's a pretty good actress in whatever she's in. Pop star Kylie Minogue looks the part as Cammy and has the lovely Australian accent to make her role work. Plus, I can't hate on Kylie. She's hot and I dig her music too. So there. It was kind of funny to see Miguel A. Nunez attempting a Jamaican accent as Dee Jay, as well as Andrew Bryniarski as Zangief [I thought Bryniarski was pretty amusing as the clueless Russian henchman]. Wes Studi looks the part as Sagat. Byron Mann played a character named Ryu with a script not allowing him to actually play that role. Damian Chapa had a better role as Ken Masters, although it could have been better. The other actors did the best they could with the material, I guess. The casting of this movie still makes me scratch my head though.

THINGS I'VE LEARNED WHILE REALIZING YOU ARE NOT MAN ENOUGH TO FIGHT WITH ME


- Ryu and Ken are involved in the arms trading business with Sagat. I'd like to use a weapon on whoever thought this was the best idea for all three of these characters.

- Vega versus Ryu's cage fight ended before it got started thanks to Guile barging in with a tank to arrest everyone. Unlike the UFC, this fight was not worth breaking your leg over.

- Bison wants to create a super soldier to help him fight the good fight. Steve Rogers is thanking the Stars and Stripes he got his serum decades prior.

- Guile faked his death to trick Bison into lowering his defenses. If only he was able to fake an American accent in the same manner.

- E. Honda feels no pain in being whipped. Neither does Kanye West. #DATASS

- Guile delivered a stirring speech to get his team to fight Bison. Or I think he did. He's still on the advanced class on his Rosetta Stone tapes, so I'm not sure.

- Dhalsim turned Charlie into a green skinned monster who is supposedly Blanka. Lou Ferrigno is laughing his ass off.

- Cammy is an expert marksman. When that bullet hits your brain, you can't get it out of your head.

THE FINAL HOWL
What more can I really say about STREET FIGHTER: THE MOVIE that hasn't been said? Besides a few silly moments that will make you laugh for all the wrong reasons [an American with a Belgium accent, really?], some actors who try to make the story work, and some attempts to bring the video game to life [if you can get that far into the film before turning it off], this video game adaptation is just terrible. I still have trouble believing the man who wrote COMMANDO and DIE HARD wrote and directed this. I still have trouble figuring out why Jean-Claude Van Damme was hired to played Guile. I'm still wondering where the $35 million budget went [it sure wasn't for the special effects].

Is it the worst video game adaptation? No, not even close. I would rather watch this than that LEGEND OF CHUN-LI reboot from 2009, plus many of those Uwe Boll adaptations. But it's a badly made adaptation no matter how you look at it. STREET FIGHTER: THE MOVIE is not worth performing a Hadouken for. Time has not been kind to this one.



SCORE
1 Howl Outta 4



9.07.2013

[SEQUEL SEPTEMBER II] The WTF? Worst Films Extravaganza Presents: Universal Soldier: The Return (1999)

DIRECTED BY
Mic Rodgers

STARRING
Jean-Claude Van Damme - Luc Devereaux
Heidi Schanz - Erin Young
Bill Goldberg - Romeo
Michael Jai White - Seth
Kiana Tom - Maggie
Daniel Von Bargen - General Radford
Xander Berkeley - Dr. Dylan Cotner
Karis Paige Bryant - Hilary Devereaux
Brent Hinkley - Squid


Genre - Action/Science Fiction

Running Time - 84 Minutes


PLOT
Many years after the original UniSol program that went awry, Luc Devereaux (Jean-Claude Van Damme) has forgiven what the program has done to his life. He's forgiven the company so much that he's even taken a job there as a consultant to a new UniSol program that will reanimate dead soldiers to work for the government. This time around though, the UniSol program is hooked up to some computer system named S.E.T.H.

Even though things seem to be going okay, the army arrives in town and pulls the plug on the UniSol project. S.E.T.H., who has now become sentient, his transferred its entire system into an UniSol soldier (
Michael Jai White) after learning about this. Now in physical form, Seth has manipulated the other UniSol soldiers in wiping out humanity as revenge for stopping the program. Seth has also kidnapped Luc's daughter, Hilary (Karis Paige Bryant). With the help of a news reporter (Heidi Schanz), Luc must stop Seth from hurting his daughter and the rest of the world.

REVIEW
I have three words for UNIVERSAL SOLDIER: THE RETURN:

WHAT THE FUCK!??


Seriously, UNIVERSAL SOLDIER: THE RETURN is a miserable sequel to a pretty great early-90s action film that was probably the peak of Jean-Claude Van Damme's career. 1992's UNIVERSAL SOLDIER had a good action plot, interesting characters, exciting direction, and decent acting from Van Damme and especially Dolph Lundgren. Except for Jean-Claude Van Damme, THE RETURN has none of what made the first film so loved.

I really don't know where to start where it concerns the screenplay. It's just a really terrible script from beginning to end. I guess the best thing it does is ignore the made-for-TV sequels and brings back Van Damme. But other than that, it's a piss-poor version of the original film. Luc gets fucked by the UniSol program again, this time by a central computer named Seth. Luc gets ANOTHER tough reporter sidekick he falls for. Luc fights more Universal Soldiers. Shit explodes. The world gets saved. It's the same film - only with a much bigger budget, but a weaker story, weaker direction, and weaker acting.

What can I even say about the plot? It's been there, done that. A sentient supercomputer gets pissed off, literally tells people "FUCK YOU" with a virtual middle finger, possesses a body, and manipulate those around him to attack the hero. It's Hal 9000 being a bitch. That's pretty much the movie. Wow, that's an entertaining movie experience! Why didn't they make this sequel sooner???

There's so much wrong with UNIVERSAL SOLDIER: THE RETURN. The biggest problem is how desperately cool it wants to be. The action sequences are really generic [jetskis, explosions, people getting shot]. So what does the film do? Add generic rock music in the background to make them "cool". How about having a computer genius named Squid, who looks like the typical late-90s stoner? He has blue spiked hair, loves his Frankenberry cereal, and drinks Mountain Dew [you know, because it's EXTREME!!!]. Yeah, he added a whole lot to the plot [not].

And how about that casting of Kiana Tom [who was one of the biggest fitness models at the time], and WCW wrestler Bill Goldberg [who was one of the biggest wrestlers at the time]? Yeah, they really enhanced the film! Especially Goldberg's great dialogue. Like when he's on fire and Goldberg says, "I'm just warming up!" Or as Van Damme kicks his ass, Goldberg mutters "I really hate that guy!" Yeah, Goldberg's Romeo is such a badass, he studied the Book of Puns. Man, he makes Arnold Schwarzenegger's Mr. Freeze want to punch him in the face for his stupid one-liners. BUT IT'S COOL, YOU SEE???

And what's the point in trying to make Luc Devereaux - you know, badass undead Vietnam soldier with superpowers - into an ordinary person? When in the hell did he have a daughter? Or a wife? How much time has passed since the first film and this one? Hell, why complicate things by giving the guy a daughter? And another female reporter/love interest? WHY??? God, she was more annoying than the last one! And why would the army even allow her to stick around the whole situation, knowing she could put them in risk? Why am I even trying to make sense out of UNIVERSAL SOLIDER: THE RETURN?

The only thing I actually liked was Seth himself. While not the most original idea for a villain, at least the character had a reason to exist. He had a clear motive. He was entirely active the entire film. He was a clear antagonist and at least gave the other characters things to do. As much as the script blew chunks, it's sad that the unoriginal villain happened to be the highlight of the plot. If that doesn't tell you about the quality of this action film, I don't know what does.

The direction by stunt man Mic Rodgers is pretty sad, I gotta say. Roland Emmerich isn't the greatest director ever, but he proved he was capable of thrilling, fun action and good pacing in the first UNIVERSAL SOLDIER film. Rodgers' work is just subpar on every level. The action sequences are dull, having no life or any sort of energy to them. The fight sequences aren't that stimulating to the eye. The film feels much longer than its 84 minutes. Rodgers also doesn't know what film he wants to direct with UNIVERSAL SOLDIER: THE RETURN. It sure doesn't feel like the first film, nor does it feel like the TV sequels. Hell, I thought the cheap TV sequels were better presented visually than this film was. I believe Mic Rodgers has never directed another film since, which doesn't surprise me. Nothing about the direction will impress anyone.

The acting is not great either. Jean-Claude Van Damme just looks bored and tired here as Luc Devereaux. His career was pretty much in the shits by this point, and this sequel was supposed to be his comeback - which unfortunately didn't happen until many years later. Even though he has producer's credit, I think even Van Damme realizes he's in a terrible film because he sleepwalks through it. The fun, charismatic guy from the first film is nothing but a shell here.

At least Bill Goldberg seems to be having fun. He's not much of an actor, but he's pretty imposing as wisecracking Romeo. His dialogue is terrible, but he tries to make the most of it. Plus, he gets to be used as a sled in one scene. I'm sure that helped him prepare for a much better film, SANTA'S SLAY, years later. Kiana Tom should stick to fitness modeling. Heidi Schanz was an inferior version of Ally Walker's character from the first film. Nothing really special about her performance as the stereotypical "tough reporter".

The only one that rose above the bad material was Michael Jai White as Seth. He's another imposing dude that played a menacing bad guy pretty well. Too bad he was in a terrible sequel, and movie in general. But even in bad material, White tends to be somewhat of a highlight.

THE FINAL HOWL
UNIVERSAL SOLDIER: THE RETURN should have never come back to theaters in 1999. Besides Michael Jai White's performance and unintentional comedy at times, this movie wouldn't be worth bothering with. UNIVERSAL SOLDIER: THE RETURN is a bad script that's not helped by lazy direction and less-than-good acting. Hell, Van Damme seems he wants to be anywhere else but starring in this movie. And he's been in some real crap in his career, so that should tell you all you need to know. This sequel is just a real mess of a film and should be avoided at all costs.



SCORE
0.5 Howls Outta 4



11.22.2011

Universal Soldier (1992)

DIRECTED BY
Roland Emmerich

STARRING
Jean-Claude Van Damme - Luc Devereaux/GR 44
Dolph Lundgren - Sergeant Andrew Scott/GR 13

Ally Walker - Veronica Roberts

Ed O
'Ross - Colonel Perry
Jerry Orbach - Dr. Christopher Gregor

Leon Rippy - Dr. Woodward

Tic
o Wells - Garth

Genre - Action/Science Fiction

Running Time - 102 Minutes


While Full Moon Reviews is mainly a horror-centric blog, I do love action films. Watching things explode, epic car chases, and people getting done in by a multitude of weapons onscreen gets this guy's blood pumping. Sometimes watching people scream as a masked killer causes blood and guts to spill out can get a bit old. So watching a good action flick, especially from the 1980s and early 1990s will do the trick.

Two of my favorite action stars happen to star in the very film I'm reviewing here today. Dolph Lundgren has been a fave since 1985's ROCKY IV, which happens to be my personal favorite of that entire franchise even though the first ROCKY is better made. I watched Lundgren in 1987's MASTERS OF THE UNIVERSE in theaters, which I'm pretty afraid to watch nowadays knowing that the cheese factor will cause my Lactose Intolerance to act up. Add THE PUNISHER (1989) and 1991's SHOWDOWN IN LITTLE TOKYO and you got yourself a fan.

And then there's Jean-Claude Van Damme - an action star I wanted to be as a kid ever since I saw him kick ass in 1988's BLOODSPORT. I have seen all of his early films such as 1989's KICKBOXER and CYBORG, 1990's LIONHEART and DEATH WARRANT, until 1994's STREET FIGHTER: THE MOVIE adaptation that soured me on Van Damme. He's done some good recent work as of late, especially 2008's JCVD film that garnered much critical acclaim.

Lundgren and Van Damme would team up a few times during their careers, but it all started in 1992's action classic UNIVERSAL SOLDIER. While the two men would later star in two UNIVERSAL SOLDIER sequels as well as the upcoming THE EXPENDABLES 2 [next year's anticipated action film], the first time is always the most special. I had seen UNIVERSAL SOLDIER in theaters during its release and I loved it, especially Lundgren's demented performance as a former Vietnam soldier. It did solid business at the box office and made Roland Emmerich's career as an action film director. But does the film still hold up 19 years later?

PLOT
We start out during the Vietnam War, where Luc Deveraux (Jean-Claude Van Damme) confronts his Sergeant, Andrew Scott (Dolph Lundgren), who has gone insane and has decided that torturing civilians and cutting their ears off for a necklace is good medication. The two end up stabbing and shooting each other to death. However the two don't rest in peace as a group of scientists hired by the government find the two to hide the evidence and use them in some sort of experiment that reanimates their corpses.

Many years later, Luc [now called GR 44] and Andrew [now called GR 13] are now part of a secret Government militia where the two men have been programmed to be fighting machines with no trace of their former lives. However, a nosy reporter named Veronica Roberts (Ally Walker) begins investigating these soldiers after they stop a terrible hostage situation. Her curiosity leads to the death of her cameraman, after Andrew kills him while taking photos for evidence. This causes Luc to have memories of his time in Vietnam, stopping Andrew and escaping with Veronica. Slowly, both Luc and Andrew begin to remember their former lives - Luc wanting to protect Veronica and find out the truth while Andrew sinks further into the pool of insanity started during Vietnam. The two eventually confront each other, battling to settle an old score and to see who truly is the UNIVERSAL SOLDIER.

REVIEW
UNIVERSAL SOLDIER was one of those films back in the day that was considered epic for action film fans who wanted to see Dolph Lundgren and Jean-Claude Van Damme kick the crap out of each other onscreen. It seemed perfect for action audiences, with the science fiction elements bringing in another audience who probably wouldn't have been as interested. Even 19 years later, UNIVERSAL SOLDIER could have been more than what it ended up being. Even so, the film is still pretty solid and watchable after all these years.

The screenplay by Dean Devlin, Christopher Leitch, and Richard Rothstein is extremely formulaic. We get the typical good must conquer evil story. We get the amnesia subplot that leads to the main characters remembering their past and hatred for each other while revealing other mysteries. We get the nosy female character who ends up being the hero's ally/love interest. We get the cliche explosions, car chases, and final battle. It's all been done before in other films, probably even better in those other films. But while UNIVERSAL SOLDIER ends up being predictable and eager to capitalize on the success of T2: JUDGMENT DAY [which was released a year prior], the screenplay follows the formula quite well and still manages to craft an entertaining, while very shallow, narrative. It's an action sci-fi movie and makes no disguise of what it is.

That being said, there are moments in the film that either don't make much sense or just added in for pad on unnecessary time. The illogical moments is best represented right at the start of the film, where Andrew Scott is murdering Vietnamese citizens and cutting their ears off after he's gone insane. While this probably happened during the war, it's odd that Andrew seems to be suffering from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder during the war rather than after it. Maybe the guy was just mentally unstable from the start, but we don't know that because the story begins towards the end of his madness rather than at the beginning. There's no idea what set Andrew off like that, especially when Luc still seems rational enough to comprehend what's real and what's right - making it weirder when both men were brothers in arms the whole way and experienced the exact same things.

Also, the whole experiment that took Luc and Andrew and made them Universal Soldiers is never really explained in enough detail to understand how it was possible. I understand the reasoning behind it somewhat, and we see some of the process during the experiment, but the issue could have been addressed better - especially since it was a huge part of the film. I mean, how did the ice heal Luc's injuries but not some of the others? I also thought the final subplot with Luc's family was too rushed and didn't feel organic at all. Not sure if it was the writing or the acting.

Then we have two filler scenes. The first one involves Luc inside the diner, where he eats a bunch of food and beats up people after they realize he's unable to pay for it all. While the scene does manage to be quite comical in a good way and allows Luc's more playful and childlike innocent personality display itself, it doesn't really move the plot all that much really. It's there just as an excuse to have Van Damme display some kick ass moves to a bunch of nameless victims. Same goes with Andrew's scene at the truck stop, which is just a scene for Lundgren to kick some nameless ass as well. While both scenes do allow some drop of personality for all characters involved to come through, the film wouldn't have changed all that much if these scenes were absent.

But the screenplay does have some decent dialogue scenes and funny one-liners by both Luc and Andrew. And the characters, while very formula and cliche, work well for the story. The innocent and moral hero, the demented villain, the nosy reporter who says she wants a story but is really falling for the hero, the power-hungry military man, and the regretful scientists - they're all here and their parts are perfect to a tee.

The highlight of UNIVERSAL SOLDIER are the action scenes. Roland Emmerich, who would later direct INDEPENDENCE DAY, STARGATE, 1998's GODZILLA, THE DAY AFTER TOMORROW, and 2012, does a damn good job creating some big action sequences. The scene where the truck driven by Andrew is ramming into a bus holding both Luc and Veronica is quite the sight. A lot of the fight sequences are quite bloody and brutal to watch. We get sliced ears. We get a lot of bullets hitting body parts, especially the head. We get broken necks, explosions, and a really bad spiking. Emmerich makes all these moments quite energetic and memorable. The film looks quite polished due to its decent budget and the pace is very good, as the film moves quite fast. We also get the typical slow motion when the hero rises up to get the upper hand against his foe. We get some nice angles. We have some great locations, creating some beautiful cinematography. Emmerich handles a very good action film visually here. I think out of all the films he has directed since UNIVERSAL SOLDIER, this one happens to be one of his better ones even to this day. It's what everyone expected out of a 90s action film, using cool visual moments and entertaining action sequences to compensate for a limited and predictable story.

The acting is better than one would probably think out of a film starring both Jean-Claude Van Damme and Dolph Lundgren. Van Damme, while not the best actor in the film, does display some decent chops through Luc's emotional journey by creating sympathy and vulnerability that allows the audience to care and root for him. Plus he handles comedy quite well also. He's really at his best when he lefts his hands and feet do the talking for him. And yes, he even shows his butt in UNIVERSAL SOLDIER. You can't have a Van Damme film without one of his trademarks, now can we? On the other hand, Lundgren manages to become the star of the film in his demented role as Andrew Scott. I bought the guy at every turn. He chews the scenery with the best of them, obviously having fun playing the villain and creating some humorous moments while still being a major bad ass. He has great chemistry with Van Damme and when the two meet, they banter and confrontation is quite entertaining. As for the other main actors, Ally Walker [best known for her role on TV's The Profiler] does okay as Veronica Roberts, nosy news journalist. The character on people is kind of annoying at times, but Walker makes the most of her part and tries to give the character some depth. She's not bad to look at either. Ed O'Ross as Colonel Perry plays an asshole and does it well as usual. And Jerry Orbach makes a cameo as well towards the end of the film. Always nice to see Mr. Orbach in anything.

THINGS I'VE LEARNED WHILE ASKING SOME RANDOM LADY TO FIND "SOMETHING HARD" [IT MEANS THE HIDDEN TRACKING DEVICE IN MY LEG, YOU PERVERTS]

- Andrew Scott made a necklace of ears during his run in Vietnam. No matter how many he'll collect, he'll still have trouble understanding Luc through his accent. If it didn't work for Rocky, it won't work for Guile.

- Luc became unresponsive as he started to remember his past. I've been the same way lately while remembering listening to that Metallica/Lou Reed album. Make it go away...

- Luc is in constant need of cooling down, standing naked in front of air conditioners and bathing in ice. If the female character was a maid, Arnold Schwarzenegger and probably Joel Schumacher would have jumped all over this.

- Veronica couldn't understand why Luc was acting so strangely. For a Profiler, she sure has trouble figuring people out.

- Andrew Scott destroyed most of the military personnel who brought him back to life and gave him orders. Once you've been one of the MASTERS OF THE UNIVERSE, being THE PUNISHER of those who believe they're better than you comes quite easily.

- Luc and Veronica had issues trying to gain control of a police bus after the driver was shot by Andrew. See, this is why Sandra Bullock has an Oscar and none of these actors do not.

THE FINAL HOWL
Almost twenty years old, UNIVERSAL SOLDIER still manages to be a good action film that will entertain fans of the genre. It's still a popular film, especially since no one knew it would spawn two made-for-TV sequels, a theatrical sequel, and two direct-to-video sequels [with one coming out in 2012]. Not surprising since the original happens to contain what action fans want - fast car chases, brutal fights and kills, humor, and two action legends kicking ass and having some fun doing so. Film snobs will crap over the fact that the narrative doesn't have much depth and is completely predictable. But that's not the point with a film like UNIVERSAL SOLDIER. It may lack in brain cells, but it compensates for it with a ton of energy and entertainment. There are better action films before and since UNIVERSAL SOLDIER, but it's still solid enough for watch when you need an action film fix.


SCORE
3 Howls Outta 4


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